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The mistake of having a favorite child

The mistake of having a favorite child


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Have you ever felt like a 'favorite son'? Or on the contrary ... was the favorite one of your brothers? Because, no matter how much you try to deny, there will always be a child with whom the mother or father feel more affinity.

The important thing is not to have or not to have a favorite child. The important thing is that it is not noticed. Because, if it shows ... if it shows, you make a big mistake. These may be the consequences.

Feeling 'the black sheep' of the family is not pleasant. It carries a host of conflicting feelings. Parents can have a favorite child. The important thing is that others do not notice. These may be the consequences of favoritism in children:

1. Affective deficiency. Children who feel relegated to the background have a deep sense of lack of affection and little bond with their parents. This will lead them from older to being more dependent on an emotional level.

2. Jealousy. One of the main consequences of sibling favoritism is jealousy. The constant fights can signal that one of the children feels displaced.

3. Grudge towards parents. When they grow up, children who were not favorites develop resentment towards their parents, who are considered guilty of not having received the same attention as the rest of their siblings.

4. Frustration. The acceptance of the frustration of these children is lower. They are unable to cope with a problem with ease.

5. Low self-esteem. By understanding that their parents do not give them the same support as their other siblings, children who are aware of favoritism will generate a problem of confidence in themselves.

6. Competitiveness. All the brothers will compete with each other.

According to a study by the Cornell University (United States), the children of parents who had a favorite child, present emotional problems not only during childhood and adolescence, but also in his adult stage. That is, children who were not the favorite children in their childhood have many possibilities of becoming hesitant and emotionally troubled adults.

To carry out this study, more than 600 children over 40 years old, who had had a great perception of favoritism in childhood, were interviewed. Their mothers weren't able to remember it, but they could.

However, the problem is not just for children who were never favorites. Favorite children have the potential to become self-centered adults with identity problems. Favorite children also suffer, or simply earn rejection from their siblings. And parents may demand more of them than of the rest. And the home, stops being it because it becomes a battlefield where the brothers compete with each other. In other words, the problem is that the children notice favoritism. In the end, everyone loses.

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Video: How the Favorite Child May Affect Sisters and Brothers (June 2022).