The shy boy. Child shyness

The shy boy. Child shyness

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Interpersonal contacts are very important in child development and in the child's psychological, school and family functioning. From his relationship with his siblings at home and his first contacts with other children in kindergarten or nursery school, children must build a series of social skills, which are part of their education and which, if not established properly, can limit many aspects of their functioning, in addition to causing great emotional suffering.

Shyness in childhood is defined as behavior characterized by a marked deficit in interpersonal relationships and a stable and marked tendency to escape or avoid social contact with other people.

A habitually active and awake child is down, inappetent, or withdrawn. In contrast, another child, who is generally calm, exhibits behaviors that denote anxiety, restlessness, inattention, constant activity, sleep disturbances, fits of rage, etc.

The consultation with the pediatrician should always be the first step, in order to rule out any organic issue. If your physical condition is shown to be good, then we will begin to investigate the psychological reasons for the changes that came to our attention.

1. Consider that children express their emotions through their behavior, as well as their games and drawings. It takes a long journey for them to express themselves through language and say for example: 'Mom, I'm sad', 'I miss Dad' or simply 'I don't know what's wrong'.

2. Let us remember that children have a much richer sensitivity than ours to perceive variations in the environment: they are always aware of our gaze, our gestures, our presences and absences (although they seem very focused on something else).

3. Let us now consider the news (good and bad) that have added to our daily lives. There are less obvious situations that children nevertheless sense: arguments between parents, estrangement, illness or death of a relative, personal crises, labor and financial problems, to name a few of them.

4. Each child has their own way of communicating their difficulty in understanding what is happening. So let us trust our mothers intuition: we will find the most appropriate time to speak to the child, with the words that our heart dictates, if only to say: 'I understand that all this is difficult for you, but you can count on me understand you. '

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